April 30, 1945

Dear Mom,

Well, tomorrow your little soldier boy is going to be exactly 21 years old. I guess it’s the same old story about whether I feel much older, because to tell the truth I don’t like too much to have to be growing older, but I guess it’s something that is kind of hard to prevent. At any rate, here’s one thing that I am quite sure that I don’t like about it and that is that I have to be over here and in the Army. But, be that as it may, here I am and God only knows when I won’t be here and where else I might be, so I guess it’s best to just take it all in my stride.

Barbie, in her letter today, April 24, said that she had been up to see you all at the farm, and it seemed as though you were having some time trying to decide where to put everything. I bet if Chuck were there it wouldn’t take too long to decide where to put a lot of the things. And, we wouldn’t have too much trouble finding a way to move them there, either. But, I guess the farmhouse is plenty big enough to find room for all the things, isn’t it, Mom? Gosh, just think of all the things that could be done up there. We need modern plumbing, a fruit cellar, one with a concrete floor and plenty of lights. Shucks, I just can’t begin to think of all things that I have always wanted to help do on the farm. I bet it sure will look nice when I come home, though. I want to see a flower garden that will practically put my eyes out with its splendor. That’s the kind that I know that you will want, Mom, and that you alone can plan and see and enjoy it as we both would like to have it. I’ll really look forward to the day when I can come home and see that flower garden, and all the many things that I have always loved about the farm.

Have you seen anything of John yet? I guess that he will never be able to make up his mind just where he wants to stay and how long. But he is doing his best and is earning himself a living and that is sufficient and I hope he is happy. What I hope most is that he doesn’t do anything that might make Daddy worry about him, because he certainly has plenty to think about right now, and I hope that he doesn’t worry too much about it all. But, I have said this before and I will say it again. If I had a wife like you, I know very well that it would be quite a simple thing not to worry about anything but that she were happy. And, I guess, not worrying too much about all that, not being married myself. But, I hope it won’t be too long before I can be married and have a chance to see what it is like. Of course, I agree with your saying that it never quite works out like we dream it, but on the other hand if it did I guess there wouldn’t be very much surprise about it, and Heaven knows Barbie and I have been dreaming about it long enough now.

How is Grammy these days? I hope she is all right. I imagine that that stove at the farm isn’t quite the same as the one back at Forest Hills. But, can we use the one from there up at the farm without too much trouble? Boy, I sure could go for some of her cooking right now, especially a lemon meringue pie or an apple. After this Army chow I have almost forgotten altogether just what good cooking like hers does really taste like.

I saw a show last night that really made the chills run up and down my spine. It was a flying picture, “Thirty Seconds Over Tokyo”. I half bit and half picked off all my finger nails and was breathless most of the time. But, unlike some of the war pictures, it wasn’t too tragic, and in a way, I enjoyed it very much.

Has Mable been up to see you very often since you have been up at the farm? I wonder if Sallie still can’t see enough of you all. I know right now I never felt more that way about seeing enough so much in all my life. It surely can’t be too much longer now, anyhow, I hope. I feel pretty good today, too. You see, I managed to get to Church this morning. Every time that I do go, I feel like kicking myself for not going every Sunday. It really helps a lot, there is no doubt about that. And, am I rusty singing now. I can’t even stand my own voice. To think that I once sang in an A Capella Choir. But, most of all, I am happy to think that at least I haven’t lost my lust for wanting to sing and that is the one thing that I never, never want to lose. Because, when I do sing, even if it doesn’t sound pleasant, it is from my heart and I usually like to sing glad, gay songs. One thing that I regret about that, though, and that is the repertoire that I know now is not what it used to be. I used to have a song ready for every one of my moods, and now it seems I can seldom think just what I would like to sing about, or how to express what is in my heart. I guess it’s usually love and fighting for the time when I can come home for good and be sure that none of my children will ever have to come over here later. I can’t always listen to the music on the radio in the hut that I like the best, either. But, what most of the fellows like is usually just what I like the most, too, so we usually are mutually satisfied. We usually listen to America Forces Network.

What have you heard from Paul lately? I do hope that everything is going all right with him. If I were sure of his address, I would try to write to him.

Well, much as I hate to say it, it is getting late and I have to go to bed some time tonight so that I can get up to throw the boxes around again tomorrow and do my little bit so that I can come home to all of you soon. Please give my love to all and best of luck.

Your loving son as always,

Chuck